Diet Fail

A blog post inspired by FAILblog, they never fail to provide a good laugh for me.
At the dinner table the other night Madi said, "I know what a verb is, it's a person, place or thing." I immediately corrected her, explaining, "no, that's a noun, a verb is a word that describes the noun." John's jaw totally hit the floor and he's all, "are you kidding me?" and rolling laughing. Education Fail.
Dieting. My last post in April was about me starting the hcg diet. I hadn't actually done it yet, just laid out the plan. Well, I received the hcg in the mail, started taking it and have lost 3.2lbs of which I have gained back only 4. On this diet you weigh yourself daily. Which,by the way totally sucks. Every morning I drag my big butt out of bed, slowly mope to the kitchen just to step on the scale and be reminded of how much I weigh. I then inject myself with the hcg and pour myself a diet Dr. Pepper. You may only have 500 calories split between two meals in a day. I watch the clock like a hawk just waiting to eat the 4oz of chicken breast, cucumber, one piece of Melba toast and an apple for lunch. Sounds delicious, no? I finally eat. By three I'm watching the clock again. I eat a similar dinner. After dinner I'm watching TV and it hits. The uncontrollable need to go to the kitchen and eat any and everything in the cabinet or fridge. I mean everything. The entire box of fruit snacks that are meant for the kids. All the Jello pudding cups (also the kids') from the fridge. A couple of Popsicles, some popcorn and if that's not enough I somehow manage to find chocolate! Diet fail.
Hmm, maybe I should reconsider a diet that starves you of breakfast, the meal that's held so sacredly by nutritionists to be the most important meal of the day, but allows you to drink soft drinks in any quantity.